Amanda + James: A Christmas Letter (2014)

I know it's "traditional" to type and print something like this and send it in an envelope to our 100 closest family members and friends, but this year we skipped the whole letter thing because we didn't feel there was anything worthy to force in front of you regarding our 2014.  But the more I think about it, the more I realize 2014 was a remarkable year for us and is definitely something worth documenting.  (Granted, I don't feel like paying the postage to send this to everyone in my address book, but it's here if you so desire to read it.)

As you probably already know, we ended 2013 on a somber note--my mom had just been diagnosed with breast cancer, and after James was laid off in November we were looking for a solution to our financial woes which resulted in us relocating to San Diego to live with my parents.  The plan was short-term; it wasn't supposed to last for any longer than it would take for my mom to heal from her surgery and for James to find a new job, but you know what they say about the best laid plans... So here we are, in December, still living at home and trying to figure out the next steps.  I guess I shouldn't say "we" are living at home, but more on that later.

I like to refer to 2014 as "the lost year," because it was really one big blur that kind of got lost in all the drama going on in our personal lives.  For those following along, my mom was diagnosed last December and underwent a double mastectomy with reconstruction on the last day of February.  Praise be to God that she was only Stage 2 and did not require any chemotherapy or radiation, but that shouldn't discredit the recovery that she did undergo.  I stayed home to help take care of her and bring her to all of her doctors appointments and as difficult as it was to be the caretaker, I know it was much more difficult for my mom.  She is back at work now and doing great; she is cancer free and has also become a vegetarian.

I purchased my first DSLR camera in March and began shooting everyone and anything, knowing I would be shooting my friend's wedding come September.  What I didn't know at the time was how transformative this whole experience would be.  What started out as a photoshoot here or there to test out new techniques soon became a profitable side-business that has kept me busy all year.  I believe I have truly found my passion in life--both photography and graphic design bring me so much joy it doesn't even feel like work.  I ended the year shooting 4 weddings and countless family portrait sessions, not to mention the engagement shoots to go along with the weddings and also a few newborn baby shoots!  I can honestly say creating DOSKOFOTO has been the highlight of 2014, and something I plan to pursue more professionally in 2015 and years to come.  While I have been shooting away, pouring over photography blogs and tutorials, making business cards and shaping my vision, James has been behind the scenes helping make everything possible.  He has taken over the accounting side of our business, built me a website, and is learning code for future DOSKOFOTO expansion.  I could not be doing what I'm doing if it were not for his constant support and encouragement.

Following her surgery, as soon as my mom was healed and back at work, the job hunt began in full-force, for both James and myself.  I started working a temporary office job for a soccer camp--the Berkshire Soccer Academy--whose office is located here in San Diego though the camp officially takes place in East Otis, Massachusetts (in the beautiful Berkshires).  What I thought was a two-month assignment soon turned into a full-time job that then led to the adventure that was our Summer on the East Coast.  After turning down the opportunity quite a few times, I eventually decided to accept a summer position as the camp photographer, so long as I could bring James along with me.  He worked at the camp doing odd jobs, but primarily working as the official camp Driver.  I accepted the position knowing it would give me exposure to a new field--sports photography--and it would also give me the opportunity to meet soccer celebrities from the USWNT like Mia Hamm and Heather O'Reilly.  It was truly amazing to watch (and photograph) them, but the best part of our summer was making new friends and getting away from home and the rut we were in.  We capped off the summer with a trip to New York City for our second wedding anniversary and we had an amazing time.  It was an unforgettable trip, filled with touristy stuff and plenty of new experiences.  I think we would be fine living there if we could afford it, but maybe only for a year or so as it is quite a busy place.

Heather O'Reilly, USWNT

Tisha Venturini-Hoch, Ange Kelly, Mia Hamm, Me, Kristine Lilly

Coming home from camp was like clearing the slate.  We were both unemployed all over again but with so many new experiences under our belt.  During the summer I had been having a lot of pain in my hips (note: I have chronic hip pain and had surgery last March to fix the right side, but it is/was still very painful from time-to-time) so I went to see my hip doctor who confirmed my fears--I would be having surgery again to fix the left side.  What a damper!  So there we were, in the middle of August, both ready to get jobs and move out just as soon as we could, but then being told I would be having surgery October 1st and would be laid up for about six weeks after.  As you can imagine, no one wanted to hire me knowing I would only be able to work for a month, and not again until December, so my job prospects were slim.  A month and a half later I had a left hip arthroscopy and femoroplasty with a little work done on my labrum.  While the surgery was a great success, I have learned that rehabilitation and recovery are no joke.  I should have learned this the last time but instead I overdid it and denied my body the recovery it needed.  This time around I made an earnest effort to take things more seriously with an intensive physical therapy routine 3-4 days a week, home and occupational therapy exercises, and many trips to the doctor to check that healing was going as it should be.  There are so many things I'd rather be doing but I have to constantly remind myself that this will benefit me the most in the future if I can be patient and disciplined now.

In October we had a lot of things happening apart from me having surgery.  Early in the month two of our friends from camp relocated to San Diego to work full time for BSA.  We've had fun helping them settle in and experience San Diego, and it's also been nice having some friends down here for the time we have left.  On October 21st my younger sister, Kayla, gave birth to their first child and my newest nephew, Bradley Shayne Boelter, who is an adorable addition to their family.

In November, James began working in Long Beach as the office manager for his fathers new accounting firm, Doskocil Accountancy.  As you might have guessed, and for those still following along, this means we are officially moving back to Long Beach in the very near future!  James is actually already living there (remember when I said "we" aren't living at home anymore?), and I will be joining him very soon as I finish up my physical therapy program here in San Diego.  On New Year's Eve we signed the lease on our new place and we couldn't be more excited to be moving back and living together again.  What a way to end the year!

So that was our 2014.  It wasn't the most exciting year of our lives, but it also wasn't the worst.  I've gained a lot of perspective this year and have come to value time with family much more than I ever did before.  While a lot of this year felt like a step backward, I know it was more like a springboard for greater things to come in 2015, even if those things are small.  In 2015 I look forward to a healthier year for myself and my family, a new home and new job in Long Beach, and continued pursuit of my passions in photo and design.  For anyone who has stuck with me through this longer-than-anticipated letter, I hope 2015 is a year filled with growth and blessings for you and yours!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

I haven't even worn makeup for the last 5 weeks!

Viewer discretion advised?

I think most everyone knows by now that a month ago I had hip surgery to reshape the inside of my right hip socket due to hip impingement.  It's a big word that means my femur bone had a sharp spur that was cutting up the labrum (soft tissue) inside my socket, causing much pain and grinding, and it would only get worse with age.  So with only two weeks notice I decided to nip it in the bud and just take care of it while I was able to.

Before surgery, all smiles!

Except for IV's. I hate IV's.

The procedure; they go in two separate places in order to get into my socket with a scalpel and a camera.

The damage; said holes and my beautiful new scars I'm rocking for the rest of my life...

Sewing up the labrum inside of my socket

 

And to finish, they shaved down the head of my femur bone.

The surgery went well with only a few complications and 14 hours later I was headed home to San Diego for rehabilitation at home with my mom and dad.  It was the nicest week and a half that I've had in a while, as I was able to catch up on many missed family dinners and conversations, and to be completely honest it was nice to just be a lazy bum for a while; I found this new contraption called Netflix, ever heard of it?

My hunny would come down and visit me in San Diego every once in a while...

Five days after my surgery I had the misfortune of experiencing dyspnea which meant that I stopped breathing, along with turning blue and numb, my mom called 911, and I got to feel what it's like to hear ambulance sirens and know they are coming to save your life.  It was a very strange feeling, not being able to pull any air into my lungs, but all I could think is, "this can't be how I go."  And it wasn't; the paramedics were there in minutes and after another trip to the hospital, a few cat scans and blood tests later (and negative), I was able to go home and bum around some more.

I also hate narcotic painkillers. They make me scratch my face to death.

The following Saturday I returned to Long Beach and since then have become a professional couch potato.  On doctors orders I have to elevate my leg for 18-20 hours a day (basically the whole day) with my trusty ice pack and lots of snacks. I  shamefully admit I have become a Netflix addict and have breezed through 2 or 3 shows.  Confession: I'm totally addicted to Pretty Little Liars and I can't wait for its return in June!  Oh, how will I survive without cable?!

#teamspoby

Today I got to go to my first physical therapy appointment (better late than never, eh?) and I will just say it was no walk in the park.  I was somewhat scolded for transitioning from crutches to cane a little too hastily, and was also reminded of the fact that I had no simple surgery, but that my condition is very serious and I need to "respect" my hip more than I am.  I got stretched out in every direction and tonight I am S-O-R-E.   But I think just like anything, in order to overcome I need to go through a little bit of pain, so that I can eventually be strengthened and pain-free.

Day 7, my first date getting up and around. Little victories.

In my last five years of schooling at CSULB I have driven past this sign nearly every day, so how ironic that I am now patronizing their business.

I would be lying if I said I'm living it up, enjoying being pampered and taken care of while laying in bed all day with nothing to do.  I'm actually going stir crazy.  Most of my days I wake up and read, or someone comes to visit, or someone is kind enough to take me out on the town, crutches, ice pack and all.  James and I even ventured out to IKEA and have now been assembling a few new pieces of furniture. It's kind of cool to receive "special" handicap treatment, getting close parking and getting to ride all of those motor carts at the stores. ;)

I never thought I'd see the day where I would want to be at work more than I want to be at home in bed ...oh wait I still don't see it that way, :P But believe me, I am ready to get back to my routines.  I miss my leg.  I miss being able to sleep on my side or my stomach, I miss being able to drive and to hurry up and down the apartment stairs.  I miss being able to take long showers without the need for a shower chair, and as much as I look cool with my cane, I really miss being able to walk around all day without wincing and having my knee swell up.  

My view, all day, every day.

It hasn't all been in vain, however.  I am feeling relief from the grinding pain I was having before surgery, which is actually quite pleasant.  I'm also enjoying this as time to reflect and do some deep thinking and meditation (I'm not burning incense or anything, but implementing Psalm 1:1-3).  I really appreciate the friends and family that have stopped by to bring a meal, or spend an hour or two entertaining me and making me laugh.  I have even enjoyed the more holistic and simplified lifestyle I seem to have stumbled into this past month.  I feel like a hippy, not wearing makeup, or a bra, or doing anything with my hair more than throwing it in a loose ponytail.  I only eat what I can scrounge up from around the fridge and pantry (I can't even check our mailbox, let alone drive to the store) so I've actually found we had a nice collection of veggies stashed away in our crisper.  And I haven't had Starbucks in so long! I've resorted to all kinds of teas, but mainly a consistent intake of beautiful h20.  

 

Our super low-key Newlywed Easter.

So it's been quite the journey, and it's not over yet, but I'm excited to continue with therapy and to grow stronger every day.  I really hate this asymmetrical leg muscle thing I have going on, so if for no reason other than the fact that it's almost sHoRtS season, I will be sure my leg gets back on track ;)

Oh and I can't forget my number 1 fan, who was kind enough to sit on my hip the day after my surgery, just to remind me how much she loves me...

#vinepost

22

Today is my 22nd birthday, and for some reason I feel like I've been waiting for this birthday all my life.  After the excitement of turning 21 fades, most people don't care too much about 22, but I feel like I have always looked forward to today... little did I know how much was in store for this year :]

Falling in love, getting engaged to my best friend, growing more deeply in God's word than ever before, watching my little sister get married and my parents renew their wedding vows, moving into my first apartment and making my own home has made for quite the 21st year. 22, show me what you've got!

This is Home

Is it really summer break? The only reason I ask is because I'm seemingly more busy now than I ever was this semester... but I'm hoping this busyness will pass.  Sorry for the lack of bloggage, but my new apartment doesn't have internet yet, so that makes it quite difficult to update.  They don't pay me to do this!

The new apartment is GREAT.  I absolutely love it.  I love it's location and the unit that we got, I love being able to fully organize and decorate the space the way I want, and I love having a little haven in the busy world where I can kick off my shoes and let myself be undisturbed.  I haven't ever had this, so it's new to me.

If there had to be a downside to the place, it's that it's a half hour drive from my work, but even that is easy for me to overcome (so long as I can put gas prices out of my mind).

[our little home]

This past weekend we got our wedding bands, which was very exciting for this girl.  I don't really understand why, but some girls (including me) just love jewelry...I can't help but want it! Ahh!

Hope to have internet soon!

Life is Heavy

Life has been so heavy lately.  Not in a bad way, just in a way like I feel every little thing that happens.  Trying to explain it to Oanh, you know how sometimes you cruise through life and you're like, "Oh my gosh, it's May, how is it May?" and April and March seem like they never happened... okay that would be living light.  Heavy is like, every day something happens and you go to bed feeling the day.  I feel like my days have been so intentional and purposeful and packed, I am feeling life really heavy right now.  But I love it!

Today was one of those morning where I set my alarm for 8 thinking that I would need a lot of time to finish homework and wakeup, but I ended up getting ready really fast and now I have an hour to do... nothing.  SO I'm blogging!

This past weekend I went home to San Diego to go wedding dress shopping for my little sister... how surreal is that?! It was 7 hours of torture...I mean, it was great.  She tried on about twenty dresses and my mom only teared up over 1.  And that was the one she chose.  I wish I could post a photo but I think I might be killed if I did that.  Just know that she is beautiful and that when the wedding happens I will surely be postin pics.  Being a MOH (Made of Honor) I know I am supposed to be helping with all of these details but I feel so useless and clueless.  Any married people out there that know a good place to find a DJ or a photographer?  I mean, there's so much more than that that has to get done that I want to do... save the dates, engagement photos, invitations.. ahhh!

After dress shopping I got to come back and just spend some time with my family in our NEW HOT TUB (which was wonderful) and before I knew it, it was wayy late o'clock and I had to drive back to LB :( But I think I'm seeing the world in rose tinted glasses right now, because none of this has gotten me down.  Sunday morning was one of those days where I was just hit with a bout of thankfulness.  Thankful for everything that I have, everything I am involved in, everything that is happening, and just where I am with God.  I have never been able to come to Him with a heart like this before and it is just so relaxing to not have a convoluted web of contingencies and ordeals that I am trying to work out.  Being still and patient has been a lot more comforting than I ever thought.

I am working the next ten days in a row and I am so tempted to just check out.  Finals are around the corner and it would be soo easy to just throw in the towel right now and succumb to the pressure to just let it slide on by.  But I won't! I have even been super good about moderating my Facebook time! Facebook is the devil, but a very resourceful devil at that...

I have been blessed to meet bi-weekly with a new friend, Katie, and have bible studies with her at my local Starbucks.  She wants to be a missionary but before she can be sent out she has to essentially "teach" 10 people the lessons that she will be teaching her students, and I volunteered to be one of her 10 test subjects.  She has been bringing me through the basics and now we are looking at the relationship between the Old and New testament.  She has an amazing way of speaking and I am learning about who God is in a way that I have not before..probably because I was too proud to admit that I did not learn it in Sunday School.  God really just desires to be with His creation, and when we stop scrambling and always trying to figure out what else it is that He wants from us (essentially, nothing, he just wants US) it makes you start to see a bigger picture.

I know that life comes in seasons and this happens to be a fruitful one for me, but I am not worried about the future when this changes.  Hope you all have a good week!

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised...She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come."                                                                                    .                          -- Proverbs 31 

#whyilovejrhigh

The End of Spring Break

Well I realize I left you all hangin.....  I got better (from being sick) and made the most of my break, and I wasn't able to be on the computer much.  But I have some pics to share, if you are curious.

So after the beach on Monday and the mall Monday night I took it easy on Tuesday.
Tommy is working on taking modeling shots.  Here were my favorite lol.

Tuesday night I went to "the asian version of Starbucks," TeaStation, and got my first taste of Royal Milk Tea (with Boba)!  I didn't know what Boba was..but now I do--it's tapioca balls!

Wednesday was similarly low key, but in the late afternoon I got to hang out with my old BFF Kyle, who (sadly) was packing up and getting ready to move to Las Vegas.  Had dinner with the fam...always a fun night...and then headed back out with Tommy for some top secret ops that I will not mention.

This week was incredibly nostalgic and awkward for me as I processed my emotions and feelings about the boys in my life recently, but let me just say that Kyle and Tommy are awesome.

Tommy collects things to give to me.  Earmuff Panda Button?  I'll take it.

As I was sitting in Starbucks with Tommy I asked him if he thought we would be friends forever, and of course he said yes.  But that meant a lot more to me than I think he realized.  It's crazy for me to think that I met him almost eight years ago, and we are still so close.  We don't follow each others' lives that closely, but we have a relationship where we get together and it's like we never missed a beat; we just pick back up right where we left off.  And I love it.

Wednesday was a lot of alone time, which I relish.  Got to go to my favorite table at Starbs and get into the Word.  Just what I needed.

Then I came home and had to get ready to head back to the LBC.  It was bittersweet.  I know I have responsibilities and a life in LB, but there's no place like home, and everyone knows that feeling.

My Kingdom.

The King.

Gifts from the King.

My dad cracks me up.  He was walking our dog, Foxy, and they got attacked by another dog and it resulted in Foxy getting a ton of stitches and spending serious time rehabing.  So my dad has taken it upon himself to make signs to educate our household..

Our first bud at the Josie House.

The car that I got to drive around for the weekend while mine was getting serviced... Win!

So then I headed back to Long Beach and it was back to the daily grind.  The good news was that Debbie came back from New Orleans on Saturday night and we got a chance to hang out and catch up, and Sunday was a great day of fellowship where pretty much everyone hung out around my house and baked and sang and made music and then capped it off watching Tangled.  I get really stressed but also really happy when we have 20 people in our living room watching the same movie, and enjoying it.

Breakfast in the 21st century (instagram-ing it up) with T-Gilley and Debs... she makes great crepes and I love that we both like butter and salt as much as we do.

  Well anyway, this update was mostly just to keep my word on updating with Spring Break pics.  Stay tuned for pic updates from my awesome weekend that I am currently having in Norcal with Deb's family.  :)