Just Like That

"You never know the biggest day of your life is going to be the biggest. The days you think are going to be big ones are never as big as you make them out to be in your head. It's the regular days, the ones that start out normal, those are the days that end up being the biggest."

--Izzy Stevens

For quite some time I've been looking for a new job, one that means health insurance and a stable, calculable income, and for months I've come up with nothing.  James got hired "temp-to-hire" at Yamaha in September and while we are hopeful his contract will be bought out in December (meaning he will come on board as a Yamaha employee, with all the amazing benefits), I'd rather be safe than sorry.  

Ever since my hip surgery in March I have longed for a job that would get me off my feet. I don't know if I will ever forgive myself for cutting my rehab short and going back to work before I was painfree. I worry I've done more harm than good, working long walking hours to make ends meet while James was unemployed, and I'm honestly too scared to go back to the Ortho doctor, out of fear he will confirm that I've done more damage and that I need another surgery.  

This past Wednesday I was off from work at Stacked, about to start my day which consisted of errands and laundry when I got a phone call asking me if I had time for an interview today or tomorrow for a job opportunity that opened up.  I thought I should play it safe and pick "tomorrow" so that I'd have time to prepare, but in the end I was asked to come in merely two hours later because they had already booked interviews for the next day.  Such short notice!  I printed out the latest copy of my resume and hurried to curl my hair before pounding down an iced coffee and running out the door.  I felt wholly unprepared and a little rusty when I showed up to speak with the President and Vice President, but apparently I wow'ed them nonetheless.  They gave me the usual lip service, telling me they really liked speaking with me and that they'd get back to me the next day.  I drove home thinking I wouldn't tell anyone about this, like it never happened, because I probably wasn't going to get the job, and last time I interviewed for a job I told everyone about it just to let them all down when I didn't get picked.  As I was trudging up the stairs to our apartment I got a text from a number I didn't recognize-- "U got the job!" 

I called them back and it turns out they cancelled their interviews for the next day, and I start on Monday! :)

I wish I felt total relief or excitement at that moment, and admittedly I did a little bit, but if you know me you know that I hate confrontation and all I could think about was how I was going to explain to Stacked that I needed to quit on the spot.  The next morning I walked into the restaurant with as much confidence as I could muster, and in what has to have been an act of God, the one manager I preferred to speak with just happened to be there, and in a great mood.  He took it so well! I was honest and told him I had been working towards this for a long time, that my family needed this and that I needed this, for my health's sake.  He was completely agreeable and actually gave me many congratulations. He reassured me of my strong work ethic and said I am great.  And that I'd be great.  And that if I ever needed anything, including one last free meal, that he'd take care of me.  And most importantly, that I didn't even need to put in a two-week's notice.  And then the relief and excitement really came.  Even in my wildest dreams I could never have pictured that conversation going so well. I bounced out of there and home to my husband to tell him the good news. :)

So today was my last day of part-time life, and I have to say I am a little sad.  I will miss my mornings drinking tea and catching up on chores and tv shows.  I will miss lunch dates with friends and being able to make appointments at non-peak hours (when the working folk get their stuff done).  But I will tell you what I won't miss, I won't miss the inconsistent hours, or financial instability that came of it, I won't miss working on holidays and weekends, I won't miss the girl-drama or the not finding out about my schedule until the week before, but most of all I won't miss coming home with swollen feet and aching joints.  Call me and old lady, but that is truly my favorite part!

Timing is a funny thing.  It's like you try so hard to make something happen, you try for such a long time and you try every avenue possible, and nothing happens.  You wake up expecting to fold laundry and stay in your pajamas most of the day, and the next thing you know you're driving to the next biggest opportunity life has to offer.  One of those times where, in the blink of an eye, your whole life changes. Just like that. I guess everything does happen for a reason, and I'm so glad.

Doppelgängers

(n.) Derived from the German language, literally meaning "Ghostly Double". 

One who nearly or completely resembles another- but with no biological relation. 
A while ago James and I started watching How I Met Your Mother after our friends Jesse and Kelly recommended it to us and we really like it.  It's a well thought out storyline, it's pertinent to married life, and it's just 21 minutes of 5 funny people to wind down with at the end of a long day. But I'm not trying to write about the show so much as one episode in particular that we recently watched, in which the gang finds their final "doppelganger" (each person on the show had the goal of finding their doppelganger at some point in the last 8 years), and Ted (the narrator) makes a very poignant point.  He notes that apart from finding a stranger in a restaurant that looks "exactly like _(insert friends name here)_" we all become our own doppelgangers over the course of our life, or even the course of a decade (or less).  We look exactly like us, and we look remarkably similar to how we looked five years ago, but almost nothing about us has remained the same.  I guess it's not something everyone experiences, but a lot of people do.  I think especially for people that go through big life-changing situations there is just so much that happens it's hard to stay the same.  I know for us, the "little Doskocils," we feel so different than we did even two or three years ago.  I was recently going through my phone, purging camera photos in order to make more memory space, and the couple that I saw in all the photos looked so foreign to me.  We looked so little, and so happy, and so carefree. That's not to say that we aren't happy anymore, but real life hit us like a ton of bricks since then and now things are just a little harder sometimes.  But there are also things we've lived and accomplished now that I could have never imagined for us back then, and I'm grateful for that wisdom.  I wish I could say we've found our stride, but in reality everything still keeps changing.  We love the flexibility and space we have to grow, and we love a lot of our recent developments, but there are still so many moments of uncertainty and times that I just want to quit being a grown-up altogether.  I think back to my goals I had in high school, or all the conversations with friends about where we wanted to be in five or ten years, and I can honestly say I'm only fulfilling maybe half the things I had planned for myself, but I guess that's God's grace that things don't always go according to our plans.  So I think it's safe to say I found my doppelganger, and maybe I'll find her again in another five or ten years, but I know I can't wait to hear her story and see what her life is like.

March; hellogoodbye.

The last month has seriously flown by, but I feel like everyone says that about February because it's a shorter month and all.  But we're in mid-MARCH! How does that happen?! I wish I could say some interesting things have been happening over here in the Doskocil home but sadly that isn't so, time has just been slipping on by.

Since I last wrote I have been to 2 more weddings (#yearofweddings!), one for my friend Melissa (my first black wedding! it was a whole new experience!) and also my friend Allison.  Allison got married at a barn in Huntington Beach that I had considered having as our venue, and it was gorgeous as expected..leaving me a taaaad jealous ;}

February - Melissa & Trent

 

Brides trading places!

March - Allison & Dave

Speaking of weddings and such... February marked our 6 months! Wow! 6 months of being married and also 1 year since James proposed.  Been looking at some photos, taking trips down memory lane- it's our favorite thing to do.

The best day, ever.  I wish I could do it over and over (kind of).

Feels like yesterday :]

This month I also got to take my niece Julianna out on a date to paint some ceramics and have some sushi (a girl after my own heart!).

 

Before, after painting, and a week later after firing it in the kiln... 

 

Her first time at Sushi Studio...

I also got new glasses because we discovered I have latent hyperopia, meaning my vision switched from entirely near-sighted to entirely far-sighted. I didn't know that was possible, but of course if indeed it were, it would happen to me.  I don't know how I feel about the new frames though, they're kind of dark against my fair complexion! We'll see...

Not too many other happenings going on over here. I think one of my favorite things about being married is the time we have in the morning to chat and prepare for the day.  And to take pictures (that's his least favorite thing about marriage...maybe ;}). 

My sweetheart <3 p="">

See you in 4 weeks, Stacked!

I suppose I will leave you with this picture I might have snapped while driving.... I had to! I guess there is a school for everything nowadays???

January and the Happs... happenings, that is.

I think the last time I wrote was just shortly after graduation... and now school is underway again! But not for me ^_^

Many people have asked, and I don't mind sounding like a broken record here, but I honestly LOVE being out of school and having very little scheduled on my plate each week.  I'm not even job hunting.  I have been made to feel very guilty and ashamed for admitting that I don't want to be working full time any time soon, because I would rather catch up on the life I missed the last 6 months (especially my new marriage), but I am trying to let those voices fall by the wayside.  I will have my entire life to work full time, and while we can afford it I would really just like to soak up life right now, exactly the way it is.  Got it? Ok.

Christmas came and went and what a lovely time it was.  I actually had time off this year so I was able to go home for an extended period of time and enjoy my family and San Diego, as well as getting much needed quality time with James before he returned to work and was inundated with his usual holiday load.

 

Now that it's the new year I feel like things are already changing, already new, without my even trying.  More and more I get the sense that I am living the life I have always held in the back of my mind, and that is one of the happiest feelings.  I notice it in the little things, like changing the way I dress and wear makeup, or how the light streams in through the bedroom window in the mid-afternoon, or even the way I spend my mornings reading with multiple cups of tea.... It's difficult to put into words but I really just love the way our life is coming together right now.

A week ago I cut off a chunk of my hair and donated it to locks of love; something that was never on my bucket list but which materialized in a moments notice leaving no time for regrets.  My long hair was so disgusting, for lack of a better word; it was damaged, uneven, fried, and lifeless.  I couldn't even get it to hold a curl anymore!  So I traded it in for a versatile short 'do which I am also quite happy about.

The flu AND sinus infection rolled through our little house starting on New Years Day and have claimed us both as victims.  I had never honestly called in sick to work, but this infection had me out for 12 days.  I think I secretly didn't mind, because it gave me an excuse to truly rest for days on end, which, if you know me (/us), that is practically unheard of.  I was so miserably ill that I could hardly take care of myself, let alone house upkeep, and I had to surrender and retreat to my bed with snacks and movies.

January brought more wedding planning for Heather and me, but I was also very delighted to attend the wedding of our dear friends Andy and Lauren Turner.  Their day was so beautiful, I just watched their wedding video yesterday and nearly cried.  It was my first wedding since my own and it was so cool to me to see how they did theirs differently, but to also have the relief of knowing mine is done and never has to be planned ever again!

Recently James also got a promotion at work, making him into one very happy camper.  It never ceases to amaze me how good his company is to their employees, and I have really seen that in the past few months as the holidays came and went.  Most days I'm jealous--I wish my boss would buy me a snuggie and bring me ice cream sandwiches on my birthday!  Either way, I'm very grateful and excited for this new turn in James' career, and I am always so proud of him for how hard he works to give us the life we have.

February means our 6-monthaversary... can you believe we've been married 6 months already?! I can't.  It feels like yesterday, but it also feels like 5 years ago.  It also dawned on me that now being graduated and married, along with a few other personal achievements, I have completed most all of the "second decade" goals that I made for myself post-high school, and have little that I long for.  Perhaps that's what's been morphing my time?

I still swoon every time I gaze at these guys too long.  Love my rings.

Right now a few of my favorite things are:

Daiso is my new favorite store--it is conveniently out by us in Anaheim and it is the cutest little Japanese $1.50 store, but it carries everything and it's NOT junk.  I know our dollar stores tend to carry cheap or generally crappy looking items, but this store sells everything from men's neckties, to women's slipper socks, to a fully stocked electronics section, and the BEST assortment of school/office supplies for those who like to keep it colorful, and it's actually good quality--I tell everyone about it!  I have to force myself to stay away most days, and I think from now on I'm going to start going in carrying only a specific amount of cash.  If you haven't been, or if you are in need of anything, you should definitely try Daiso.  Just off the 5 at Euclid!

 

Vine is a new app that just surfaced, very similar to Instagram but instead of photos it's a feed for 6-second video clips.  There are so many times that I have wished for an app like this, and now that it's here I'm elated.  I know they still have a lot of kinks to iron out but its so fun to make little video clips and also to be saving these snippets of our life.  I smell a complication in the near future...

Foster the People. Everyone knows them for their overplayed, hipster-esque "Pumped Up Kicks" and for this song I had crossed them off my list, labeling them as annoying.  But lately I heard a few more of their songs and I actually have been enjoying them very much.  Great music for cleaning the house ;D

So that's our January, into February we go! Next weekend I am going to my friend Melissa's wedding (not my bridesmaid Melissa, a different one!).  I am secretly really excited because it's my first ever African-American wedding.... did I just say that?! Anyways, I can't wait to witness another beautiful day for some precious friends, and also experience a great dance party! :P  Posts to come!

This year, to save me from tears, I gave it to someone special...

Part of me feels like apologizing for neglecting this blog recently, but the realistic side of me knows that blogging consistently nowadays is a rare feat.

The past month has been crazy and wonderful at the same time.  Crazy because as the semester was winding down I was struggling to complete my internship hours while balancing working and completing my endless class projects, but wonderful because I am now a college grad. :]  Not too much to comment on about that except that I'm stoked and I am glad to finally be afforded time to catch my breath, enjoy being a newlywed, and truly refocus on the things that are important to me.

My after-finals-week sentiments exactly.

For my Christmas/graduation gift my sweet hubby upgraded me to an iPhone 5, which was perhaps not the smartest thing to do during finals week.  I couldn't tell you what it does (more than the iPhone 4) but I know it's nice to have storage space again, seeing as my old phone had reached its capacity and could hardly take pictures anymore.  The camera on this phone is super spiffy, and I'm sure you'll reap the benefits of that here on my blog, especially since the last time I charged my real camera was on our honeymoon.  :P

Can I just comment on how much I am loving this holiday season? Last year was unfortunate, having to work through the holiday and being depressed as all get out, but this year has been so much more enjoyable and I am embracing it full on.  We put up our tree the week after thanksgiving and we have been playing Christmas music ever since, which is a first for me.  Being on our own has been nice too, because we can decorate and celebrate however we like.  We've even been to a few Christmas parties!  Last weekend we holed up for our first holiday movie of the season, sweetly aided by the lovely rainy weather we've been having.  Even in SoCal, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

This past week was exciting because one of my best friends got engaged.  Heather and I became neighbors when I moved into my apartment in June and since then we have really meshed together.  She has known James for close to 10 years and its always fun for me to listen to them reminisce about times past.  I am excited for what's in store for them and also to participate in the wedding-planning process from a different position this time... ;]

On Thursday James and I get to travel "home" to San Diego to be with my family a bit before returning to LB for the holiday.  I can't believe how quickly Christmas creeped up this year, but I suppose that just means 2013 is coming even sooner, and oh how I am looking forward to next year! 2012 has been good to me, probably the best yet, but I know 2013 is going to be a year of even more change for us, which is always exciting.  

More updates to come, check back soon!

Broken

Sometimes I forget that I can't always be strong.  Sometimes I forget that I can't really be a stellar multi-tasker 24/7 and expect to feel rested, happy, financially stable, wedding-ready, and prepared for finals and moving all at the same time.  I'm currently sitting here in some random Starbucks in Garden Grove, crying over news that I didn't want to hear from my doctor, and I feel so weak.  Maybe it's just coincidental timing and I'm at a point in my week where I was already exhausted and at the end of my rope, and maybe it has to do with the two essays that I'm currently putting off, despite their eminent due date, but this week is just draining me entirely. OH, how I wish I could just put everything and everyone on hold for a while, so I could catch up on life and keep my head above water.  Get well soon, self...

January came and went, like a first breath of fresh air.

Tomorrow is the last day in January, and can someone please tell me where all the time went?  I swear I was just blogging about New Year's....

So I guess you're wondering what's up?  Here are the happs--I will tell you all that I can remember, but don't count on it being in order:

At the beginning of the year my little sister got married.  My LITTLE sister got MARRIED!  It was no small ordeal.  Let me tell you, she looked BEAUTIFUL (the most beautiful I can ever remember seeing her) and the whole day was just wonderful.  I am so happy for Kayla and Shayne (perhaps a bit jealous too) but I can't wait to see what great things God has in store for them.  It was great to see all of my [extended] family who made it out to California, and it was a treat for James to get to meet them all (I don't know to what extent he would agree with that, my family is kind of "unique," but it was a treat for me.)  In order to spare you from photo-barfing (and since I'm quite sure many of you have seen the pics on Facebook) I'll just post these few:

(Trying to take pictures of pictures is never easy.)

The happiest maid-of-honor to be found :]

Following the wedding I returned to Long Beach for my last week of work at Jamba Juice.  It was bittersweet for sure.  While I was glad to get out of there for numerous legitimate reasons, I will/do miss a lot of my coworkers and even my regular customers (and CBTL baristas).  But I cannot lie--the time off since then has been THE BEST.  My last day of work was the 17th, about 2 weeks ago, and since then when I have not been in school I have been: a) sleeping, b) watching movies, c) cooking, d) going home to San Deigo, e) catching up on numerous girl chats with friends I had placed on hold, f) studying the Bible, g) going to the gym(!), and/or h) spending time with my favorite guy (pictured above).  It's been wonderful.  As much as it looks like I've become a lazy slob, I think I really needed some time to slow down on work and catch up on life, remembering all the things that bring me joy.  And now, after this time, I think I am ready to go back into the work force.  (Which, for those of you who don't know, begins next Tuesday the 7th!)

Out to dinner at Le Creperie to celebrate after my last shift, and [little did we know] Deb's promotion!

Going goth for Starbucks.

When I say I have been spending some time cooking, I mean I have been SPENDING SOME TIME COOKING (cooking, as opposed to fast food, takes a long time).  I got a great beginning cookbook for Christmas from James' sister Laura and we have been going through it making a bunch of new dinners.  I have also been learning the breakfast plates and even some of the snacks, and I'd say I feel pretty proud of my jump in skillage.  Our favorite dish to make (by far) is Buffalo Chicken Sub Sandwiches.  We have made it for quite a few people (always trying different modifications and getting feedback) and we also like to make it for ourselves so that we can have leftovers for James to bring to work for lunches.  It is SO DELICIOUS, if I do say so myself.

Our first attempt.

Buffalo Wild Wings sauce, keeping it authentic.

Mid-prepping.

When we have the time, we now prefer to cook instead of takeout.  It is expensive to buy the fresh [bulk] ingredients, but I think in the end you get more meals out of what you buy, and it's usually at least a LITTLE healthier than eating out...  Here are a few pictures that happen to be on my phone, since I take pictures of things I'm proud of...

The Chef

Chicken Parmesan

Cheesy Quinoa and Peas (our first healthy dish!)

Balsamic & Garlic Chicken

For those of you who live under a rock, next weekend is the Superbowl, or as I prefer to call it, the official-end-to-football-season-weekend.  I think I served my term well; I have been a faithful girlfriend to the end, watching almost every single game that we were around for, but in all honesty, I'm so glad to have our Sunday's back!  (Plus it is getting warm and sunny again (no wind!) so we can start disc golfing again.)  This weekend James' friends (my friends too now [: ) and all the girlfriends are doing a somewhat epic Superbowl weekend celebration, starting on Thursday night and ending with the game on Sunday, with a little bit of Disneyland and game nights in between.  I'm excited!

Taking the Packers game very seriously.... 

My very best girlfriend Deb has been kind enough to teach me some Photoshop tricks and lately I have been nothing short of obsessed with this program.  I mean, Jamanda's bed time is still a faithful 10pm (if we can even hold out that long), but this half of the monicker has been staying up a little later these days (and paying for it when I remember I signed up for an 8 AM CLASS!! What was I thinking?!).  These were my first PSE10 creations from last week, of which I was a little bit proud!

(Sometimes I wonder what he really thinks of me.)

Deb aslo taught me how to make espresso! I'm sure I will be able to pay her back, once I learn the in's and out's of Starbucks..

Last Thursday I got a root canal and a crown replaced (and it unfortunately took three hours to complete) and as a result I have been unable to chew on the left side of my mouth for five days now.  My tongue is all shredded up from the new crown (and still tastes of enamel) and I can't sleep on that side of my face (or the other side, thanks to my aggravated ear piercing) and so I just toss and turn all night till I find something that works.  OH if you only knew how uncomfortable it is.  I feel like the muscles on the right side of my jaw are going to get super buff and I will look like an asymmetrical monster by the time the three weeks are up.  (I have to wait three weeks till I go back and get my porcelain crown.)  I think I still have a headache from all the drilling.

As I mentioned before, I am back in school, at 8AM(!) on Mondays and Wednesdays.  It is awful and I regret it every time my alarm goes off, but then I remember that this is the last time I will be a full time student and then I brighten up immediately.  I spoke to my advisor last week and I am all set to graduate after Fall 2012, assuming I do my internship practicuum and final HDEV class next semester.  Not even a year more and this girl will be done with CSULB.. :]

Tomorrow night James and I are starting a new class on the Parables in the Bible and we couldn't be more excited.  Studying the Bible together is one of the best and most fulfilling things we enjoy doing together, and it only gets better as God allows for more and more perception and understanding.  In addition to our new weekly class, we have officially moved up to The Fold at church (the new young adults group) and after the first meeting, we are very excited.  It was great to see so many old familiar faces that we haven't been around since being in the college group.  For the first time in a long time we are actually the youngest people in the group and we are in a place where we truly need the community of these believers that are in similar life stages as we are.  It's like no group I've been in before, which is good and bad, but we are happy with the change and we are looking forward to what the Big Guy has in store for us in 2012...

With that said, I think I am off to the gym! (Trying to work on my NY resolutions!)
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--t.C.R.